You can take a girl out of Essex….

Essex GirlFrom my Dad…  Posted because I went home for the weekend and because I wore my white stilettos on Friday night (honestly) and because I don’t forward these things on but it’s worth sharing.

alma chizzit – A request to find the cost of an item 

amant – Quantity; sum total (“Thez a yuge amant of mud in Saffend”) 


assband – Unable to leave the house because of illness, disability etc 


awss – A four legged animal, on which money is won, or more likely lost (“That awss ya tipped cost me a fiver t’day”) 


branna – More brown than on a previous occasion (“Ere, Trace, ya look branna today, ave you been on sunbed?”) 


cort a panda – A rather large hamburger 


Dan in the maff – Unhappy (“Wossmatta, Trace, ya look a bit Dan in the maff”) 


eye-eels – Women’s shoes 


Furrock – The location of Lakeside Shopping Centre 


garrij – A building where a car is kept or repaired(Trace: “Oi, Darren, I fink the motah needs at go in the garrij cos it aint working proper”) 


Ibeefa – Balaeric holiday island 


lafarjik – Lacking in energy (“I feel all lafarjik“) 


OI OI! – Traditional greeting. Often heard from the doorway of pubs or during banging dance tunes at clubs 


paipa – The Sun, The Mirror or The Sport 


reband – The period of recovery and emotional turmoil after rejection by a lover (“I couldn’t elp it, I wuz on the reband from Craig”) 


Saffend – Essex coastal resort boasting the longest pleasure pier in the world. The place where the characters from TV’s, popular soap opera, Eastenders go on holiday 


tan – The city of 
London , the big smoke 

webbats – Querying the location something or someone is. (“Webbats is me dole card Trace? I’ve gotta sign on in arf hour”) 


wonnid – 1. Desired, needed. 2. Wanted by the police 


zaggerate – To suggest that something is bigger or better than it actually is. (“I told ya a fazzand times already”)

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Comments
2 Responses to “You can take a girl out of Essex….”
  1. Robyn says:

    Having spent the majority of my ski holiday with 24 folk from Essex I was speaking such lingo by the end of the week. I was a bit Dan in the Maff to leave them behind. :0)

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